Episode Transcript
PODCAST ONE...
Hey Guys, and welcome to my first of many Podcasts.
I should introduce myself. I am Paul Steen, a published self-help author, Certified Life Coach, Mentor, Motivational influencer, Public Speaker, and hopefully soon to become your favorite Podcast Person—or at least a regular part of your podcast life.
And Even though I can't walk on water or leap over tall buildings in a single bound. I am unique, just like you.
I have days that are great and days that could be better.
But fortunately, I have mastered the skills not to allow anything to be bigger than me.
Looking back, I can hardly believe that statement came out of my mouth.
Please allow me to explain. Because of situations as I grew up, I carried a lot of resentment. And this resentment would often come out in anger, depression, irritability, and hatred.
I was always an unwilling "As I beleived then" participant on a horrible roller-coaster ride of an existence.
My Father, among other things, tried to pour hot cooking grease on me, which may have been the start of my journey to no.
Because I swore to myself if anyone ever tried to harm me again, it would be their last act on this earth.
Anyway, back to some of my life. I have experienced four near-death experiences, including possibly being burned alive and crushed by an eighteen-wheeler. My older brother had overdosed and died. I lost my English grandmother, the only person I knew who loved me unconditionally from a young age.
I must add that at least two of my American grandparents did too.
I lost my dearest furry four-legged friend, a wolf hybrid named "Wolf," after being forced to move from my house after an extended layoff.
I had to leave him at a friend's house. He died from heatstroke.
I came home to find my beautiful wife dead on the floor from a berry aneurysm and my ten-month-old son asleep in his bed.
And then my wonderful in-laws tried every trick in the book, including lying, stealing my paycheck, and two years of being drug through the court system to try to steal my son.
And let's not forget my Father dying from malnutrition and dehydration because he had given Power of attorney to my niece, who was hooked on crack, and wanted him dead to benefit financially.
I'm not telling you things for your sympathy; I am simply pointing out that I may not have an S on my chest. I have certainly earned it. And I guarantee plenty of listeners have earned their S's also.
Also, I will revisit these stories and share some of the ways I made it to the other side and how important it is for everyone to create mental and emotional boundaries with the Power of "No."
My baby girl was taken out of state when her mother remarried. And wouldn't let me have access to her for years. Then later, I found out that the husband had "Let me just say" inappropriate intentions and actions toward my daughter.
In several instances, I decided to take someone's life. And the only thing that saved me was the Grace of God. And the realization of the effects and consequences that would inflict on my lovely children.
And lastly, but certainly not the least, was when the love of my life was no longer in my life. No, the separation did not come from any of the usual messiness. As we evolved as people, we grew apart. We are still close to this day. We are still there for each other. That is as far as it goes. However, I still treasure her as a dear friend.
So, it is genuinely an incredible statement to hear I am now unaffected and more significant than anything that life throws at me. And I don't allow anything from the past to be anything but the past.
I have mastered controlling the movies that my mind plays, just like I own watching Netflix.
I have reached this point, often kicking and screaming, through the Power of no. The Power of no, as I like to call it, is an incredible tool.
Because our entire lives hinge on "Yes" and "no."
We may not use these words in their purest form. But they are still there. And they always appear together. If you say no to something, you are saying yes to something else. And vice versa.
You are probably asking what "no" has to do with all of this.
Admittedly, I have given you the short version. I started with the solution. And at the end of my journey to a constant calm.
If someone had told me years ago that it was all about no, I would have told them, "No," it is not.
Please take the time to listen. Much of what I will say in your current mindset may be unacceptable, obscure, or ridiculous.
Because when drowning in an endless sea of emotional tsunamis, it's tough to believe there is a safe beach over the horizon.
Before we start our journey together, remember I am not a Therapist, Clinical Psychologist, or Psychiatrist. I do not claim to treat the so-called "mental issues." I am not suggesting that you stop your therapy or medication.
However, I have made it to this point of constant calm, with only the occasional momentary ripple, having never spent one moment in therapy or taking a single pill.
But this has been my journey, and everyone reaches the same destination on their chosen path.
Sometimes the path leads nowhere, and sometimes to victory.
We all have a beginning.
Everyone's journey starts in the womb. But this is still not the beginning because we inherit genes. And these genes have an influence. The way our mothers feel during pregnancy also influences us.
Our environment, cultures, countries, and historical birth time also play a part. We go through situations and experiences as we go through a series of development.
Here is where we choose to be hurt or grow. I hear someone saying, Paul, I did not select anything; these are permanent afflictions, so I must forever be the way I am.
Unfortunately, that statement is as authentic as you give it the Power to be.
And the initial problem that it creates is you will need more mindset change.
It's like saying I am a sexist. Using the term sexist permits you to act a certain way without remorse or self-evaluation.
"I am a sexist" means I mistreat people irresponsibly, unfairly, and without remorse because of their genitalia.
You can see which perspective would give a person an "Aha" moment.
The "Aha" moment is the first agent of permanent change.
Then there is the Reinterpretation of Perspectives.
And then the application.
We will explore and analyze these last three elements in the next episode. I hope you found value. And I look forward to sharing it with you again.
Please remember to Love Yourself. You are Not Alone. You are relevant and worthy.
How About that?
